Death, Devotion, Dissonance

Chapter 120 - Madness All Around



Endra walked in circles in front of a mirror, muttering incessantly, his eyes bloodshot and unfocused. He glanced at the domes above to make sure that whatever was happening outside was happening for real. 

Edmund was carrying Evin through the streets he used to play in, leaving a trail of blood in his path.

"Those accursed mages! Look what they did to my boy…" the man muttered all the while. "You'll be safe in your father's hands… I'll treat you proper this time. I won't make the mistakes I made with Lora."

The past half a year wasn't kind to Edmund. He had thinned greatly compared to his hulking shape from back then, and his greying hair began to fall from the top. Edmund himself wasn't so kind to himself, as was evident from his grimy clothes and reeking body. It wasn't so wrong to say that the man was going insane.

But Endra himself wasn't so well off, either. Except for his relatively clean clothes, he looked just as addled as Edmund was. He constantly spoke to the mirror, one which he tried to shatter countless times these past few minutes.

"Do you have to do this? Isn't this taking things too far? Come on, you're better than this! The boy himself said it, didn't he? He's just going to wait until he's capable enough to stand by my side so the reunions wouldn't be so awkward and silent. I just have to wait till then and we'll have our happy ending…" 

"Worthless! Isn't that just a rose excuse he made to rationalize his needs?" Endra answered himself, gnashing his teeth. "You really think you're going to be rid of him?"

"But so what? Just because he's acting like a child, you're going to traumatize him even further? He's just lost his goddamn legs for fuck's sake! What the hell did you do when you were fucking ten? You sat at home and let our parents feed you and teach you things. You were also going through our trauma, but are you sure you want to make Evin go through the same thing? By his own hands, no less!"

"He's 14 in this world!"

"Who the fuck cares? He's still a child!" Endra screamed as he swung his fist against the mirror. "You're fucking better than this."

He lied down, holding his hand above his eyes. 

"I'm going crazy again… what shitty timing."

His head felt like it was splitting by the middle, with conflicting thoughts appearing on both sides. It wasn't the first time. Endra was used to talking to himself. It tended to happen a lot when you were lonely spirit with no one else to talk to. 

It wasn't so weird for it to happen here, either. His situation wasn't so different on Alvox, with the only one that could hear him being a boy of 10 years. And with the stress that accumulated from the prior days' events, it was becoming more and more difficult to stay in control. 

Sighing, he removed his hand and saw the domes. The images showed Edmund tying Evin up to a chair with ropes, telling him it's going to be okay.

Endra didn't know what the man's plan was. Why did he see Evin talking with a bunch of kids, then headed back to his house to get a stick, stalked Evin from behind so he wouldn't be able to see him, and then whacked Evin on the back of his head when he was left alone? Now he's even tying him up with ropes… but what the hell were ropes supposed to do against a mage?

"But most of all, why am I allowing this to happen? I even helped Edmund, so he could approach Evin without being detected… Of course, it's because I saw a chance to make my point, and I took it."

Endra was so close to his goals of obtaining clues to separate his soul from a body, if only Evin requested for the Heim Morton's research materials on golems from the kingdom. If they managed to put human souls in golems, surely they knew how to do the same, but with another human as host.

With such research, Endra would finally make some progress towards his ultimate goal. But Evin had to go and request for some useless research on Absolutes, crushing Endra's hopes. The boy even refused to cede an inch of control during the incident, fearing that Endra would take over his mouth and say something else.

After that incident, Endra refused to speak with the boy and cooped up inside his little world, thinking of countless things he could do to convince Evin otherwise.

Endra knew that it was a phase of Evin's, one that he'd grow out of at some point… but Endra didn't want to wait that long. He was becoming more and more impatient by the days, and his growing insanity wasn't helping the situation. This thing with Edmund that he was thinking of was the perfect example of his deteriorating mind.

Sighing, he wrested control of Evin's mouth, lungs and mana-core. It was difficult, but it was possible with how Evin was becoming so open to his presence lately. The rest of Evin's body was still inactive, though.

"I thought you were going to do things right this time?" Endra spoke, using Evin's mouth.

"Evin?! Evin! No-no. This isn't what it looks like!" Edmund's panicked face appeared in front of him. The man held Evin's shoulders tight, and continued. "I'm going to help you. But I'm going to need you to keep still, alright? I'm going to smoke that damn Voice from inside your head. You're gonna feel a bit uncomfortable, but it'll be over in no time."

'Ah, he's also lost it…' Endra thought with resignation. 'At least the way he acts makes it easier for me to do what I plan to do…'

"I thought you'd changed from the time you spent alone, but you're still the same fucking psycho."

Edmund showed a face of confusion. "Evin, what are you talking about?"

"It's not Evin you're talking to," Endra finally revealed. "I'm what you like to call the Voice inside your son's head."


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