Wooing my Bodyguard Wife

Wei Yan spluttered, face red.

“Yah, don’t pollute the lake water!” Xue Ning scolded disapprovingly. “How are the wildlife going to survive if you toss his body inside? Think of the bacteria!”

“You’re right, Xue Ning,” Jingwei said adoringly as he began to wrap his arms around her, and they began to sway idly in the wind. “You’re so thoughtful! The best person I know!”

“Come off it, flattery will not get you anywhere.” Xue Ning scoffed, but the corners of her lips were moving up against her will. Relief was making her dizzy, so she leaned in closer to him, enjoying the warmth of his body. They’ve cleared the air, and the townspeople and her parents have accepted her new relationship.

(If she sniffed him like a dog, she could almost smell… herself, thanks to their earlier activities in the clearing. So, she decided that she’ll be a normal, rational woman. She wasn’t going to sniff him! Much.)

“If you don’t wish to be tied up, the alternative is knocking you out repeatedly with brute force,” Tai Cheng added serenely, as he flexed his arm muscles. “Would that be more preferable for you?”

Wei Yan paused, thought about it, and shook his head. His nose and crotch were still aching, and if Li Tai Cheng knocked him around the head, he might not wake up.

Although… that wouldn’t be such a bad thing. He wouldn’t need to see this couple and their disgusting displays of public affection. While he was tied up, Jingwei had murmured something into Xue Ning’s ear while hugging her from the back, causing Xue Ning to blush hotly and smack him.

It was definitely something perverted!

“Hey! Stop smirking at me!” Wei Yan complained.

“I was?” Jingwei asked, with an innocent tone that fooled no one.

“Should I be worried?” Xue Ning asked, in the tone of someone who was decidedly not worried.

“Xue Ning, my beloved darling, I could never tear my eyes away from you.” Jingwei assured, kissing her knuckles. Her parents pretended not to see.

“How can I stand in the way of such a heartbreaking romance between you and Wei Yan?” Xue Ning retorted cheekily. “How can I fight with such a strong obsession?”

“The both of you deserve each other.” Wei Yan said flatly. He turned to Tai Cheng and pleaded. “Uncle, just knock me out right here and now!”

Tai Cheng only patted him on the shoulder and shook his head. “We must all live with the weight of our mistakes. That’s how you grow.” He said, in the tone of a wise old man giving sage advice, but Wei Yan caught the glint in his eye! This old man also wanted revenge!

“Come on, let’s go back inside.” Tai Cheng hummed a cheerful tune, expecting them to follow.

Ming Guang then helpfully dragged Wei Yan’s immobile body back to the house, giving him the lovely view of the couple nosing at each other, as though they hadn’t spent the afternoon already wrapped around each other.

Disgusting. Terrible. The worst. Wei Yan was going to slam his head against a wall to knock himself out if he had the leverage to stand properly to do so.

Unfortunately, lady luck was not on his side, and he was plonked on their living room floor while Jingwei and Ming Guang called Captain Mu to report his misbehaviours.

“Hello Captain Mu! It’s me Jingwei!” Jingwei said cheerily into the phone.

“Are you in trouble?” Captain Mu demanded, immediately thinking of flight schedules to Hubei.

“Don’t worry, I’m still alive, but I need you to take Wei Yan away – oh no no, he’s perfectly fine, uninjured, but he tried to steal my wife away from me while sucking up to my in-laws, so you can see why I need him gone. Now he’s tied up and trying to chew through the rope, so can you send someone to pick him up?”

Captain Mu paused, digesting Jingwei’s words. If Jingwei wanted to make an excuse to get rid of Wei Yan, this was a truly ridiculous one. What nonsense was this about tying Wei Yan up? Jingwei wasn’t a child any longer – he shouldn’t be telling tales. Clearly he had to talk to Ming Guang, the only responsible adult.

“Very funny Jingwei. Can you pass the phone to Ming Guang?”

“Captain.” Ming Guang greeted him respectfully.

“Ming Guang, explain.”

“It’s what Young Master Sun said. Wei Yan’s principles have been compromised and he’s now a liability. He cannot stay here any longer. Please send a replacement.”

“So he was serious?!”

Captain Mu cursed on the other end of the line. He already had enough trouble dispatching the numerous threats to Sun Tianwei’s leadership, but now there’s trouble on the other end too? He should have known something was up when he didn’t get any daily updates.

“Fine. I’ll send Qing Ge to the apartment.” Captain Mu breathed deeply, mentally envisioning the change in shift schedules. Troublesome, but doable. Thankfully, the apartment wasn’t too far away.

“Captain, no one’s at the apartment. We’re in Hubei now.” Ming Guang said apologetically.

“What? Why?!” Captain Mu pointedly did not scream into his phone, even as Tianwei raised an eyebrow at him from his desk, before shushing him. He had a lot of expansion plans in mind, and he couldn’t work if his guard was noisy. Captain Mu bit his tongue.

“We’re visiting Miss Li’s family now.” Ming Guang said. Captain Mu can hear Jingwei yell in the background. “I’m going to be the best son-in-law they’ve ever had!”

“I’m their only daughter – so of course you’ll be the best son-in-law. You’ll be the only one?” Li Xue Ning chimed in from the other end.

Captain Mu rubbed his temples.

“Fine. Fine. I’ll send Qing Ge over, but he’ll take almost a day to arrive. Keep Wei Yan there in the meantime!”

“Captain! Save me!” Wei Yan yelled from the floor. “I want to die!”

“Don’t worry, he’ll be safe with us!” Jingwei promised, snatching the phone from Ming Guang’s hand. “Take your time. It’s not as though anything terrible will happen here. We’re in the middle of nowhere!”

Oh. If only that were true.