Pay With Your Heart

"Eun-sun get up, you're going to be late for work," Hei-Ran said for the third time as she gently shook Eun-sun, who was still lying down on the bed. But she still didn't budge.

Hei-Ran could tell she was only pretending to be asleep. Hei-Ran walked to the other side of the bed and pulled the quilt off her body.

"Leave me alone." Eun-sun cried as she snatched the quilt back from Hei-Ran and covered herself back.

"Just go away, I don't want to go to work, I quit," She said as she buried her face in her pillow. She was yet to get over the embarrassment of what happened last night. Her shameless act was mortifying enough for her to die right now.

Hei-Ran looked at her and sighed. She climbed the bed and pulled the quilt away from her and threw it on the floor.

"You better get up now. Lying in here won't make you feel better. Common let's talk about it" Hei-Ran said as she pulled Eun-sun up and sat in front of her.

Eun-sun shook her head, "I don't want to talk about it. It's so embarrassing" She picked up the pillow and covered her face with it.

Hei-Ran gave her a light smack on her arm, and pulled the pillow from her, "You're twenty-five, what's so embarrassing in kissing a man?" Hei-Ran almost chuckled out when she remembered the scene from last night, but she stopped herself, before Eun-sun vents on her and breaks her pinky.

Eun-sun buried her face in her hand when Hei-Ran said that. Her face turned red when she remembered the way she gripped his jacket and pulled him down before kissing his lips. How embarrassing!

"Hei-Ran I don't think I can ever face him" She cried, making Hei-Ran cock her brow.

"Why?" She inquired.

"Be... because...I don't know it's just so embarrassing. First he kis.. me and then I ki..." She couldn't even bring out the word from her mouth.

Hei-Ran shook her head. This was the first time she was seeing Eun-sun acting like this, and for the first time, she was behaving as a girl should. Acting shy and stuff.

"You know the word you're looking for is 'kiss'. It's not so hard" Hei-Ran tease.

"Just shut up!" Eun-sun snapped.

"Fine I will, but let me ask you something, why did you kiss him back?" Hei-Ran curiously asked. Knowing Eun-sun's personality she had expected to see her giving Dan-Han a shoulder flip or a punch on the face. At least that was what she had done to the numerous guys who had made advances at her. But when she saw her kiss him back, she felt thunderstruck. It was as if a lighting bolt had hit her and she was beginning to imagine things.

Eun-sun covered her face with her palm, and said, "I don't know" She didn't know what had come over her. She was so shocked when he kissed her, so much that she forgot to breathe. She didn't know how long it lasted, maybe a minute, or some seconds, she didn't know. But aside from the wave of shock which she felt at the time, there was something else. Something she couldn't describe. There was this jelly feeling in her stomach and her heart won't stop thumping, almost as if all the adrenaline in her body had been released at the same time. And her brain she too shocked to respond to anything, but when he pulled away and touched her cheek, she felt like electricity buzzed through her. And when her eyes met with his and she saw the way he was looking at her, she just felt a thud in her heart and the next thing she was holding on to his shirt and.... she kissed him back.

Hei-Ran paid rapt attention to her face, and confusion was evident in her eyes.

"Do you like him?" Hei-Ran couldn't help but ask but Eun-sun vigorously shook her head.

"No, I don't!" She hastily replied. Her response was too firm and quick making Hei-Ran suspicious. It seemed like Eun-sun was trying to convince herself and not her.

Hei-Ran cocked a brow at her, "Are you sure you don't like him?" She asked, but continued without waiting for her.

"Because from what I saw, it looks like you're developing feelings for Mr Lee"

"That's not true!" Eun-sun fiercely denied.

"You think?" Hei-Ran raised a brow at her. "These last few days, did you notice the way you acted when he was here? You're always chirpy, smiling and happy whenever he was around and when he wants to leave, you have a poor countenance. Your face lits up when he calls and you keep talking about his new projects and how capable he is–"

"Because he is capable. What's so wrong in acknowledging someone's talent, and I don't do all those things you've said" Eun-sun interjected her.

"When you say someone is good, it's fine. But when you start singing it, that means you're always thinking about them in your heart" Hei-Ran told her.

"But that doesn't mean I like him?" Eun-sun refuted. "Yes he's been good to me and he treats me differently more than anyone has done in the last ten years and it makes me feel....."

"Loved?" Hei-Ran said when Eun-sun slurred.

"Maybe, I don't know" She shrugged.

"He keeps telling me he loves me and maybe it's growing on me, but I don't think I like him that way. He's a good man, and he's different from how people see him. He has a good heart and I don't want him to think I'm trying to take advantage of his feelings or his kindness. I really shouldn't have done that. I wonder what he'll think of me now?" Eun-sun said in a sad tone.

"What are you saying?" Hei-Ran questioned. She didn't understand Eun-sun's reasoning right now.

Eun-sun shook her head and continued, "Hei-Ran you know no one ever wants me, except you and now him, even mother said I'm cursed, my dad left me, grandma died too and I've been all alone. Maybe I've been alone for too long and I let my emotions get the better part of me last night. I really don't like him, even if I do, then I must stop" Eun-sun said in a dull voice, her eyes were slowly turning teary.

"Why? Eun-sun stop saying that. You were never alone. I've always been here for you. And now there's someone else who loves you too"

"That's the problem. His feelings are the reason why I'm acting this way. Acting out of character. Mother says I'm cursed, that I'm evil, so what if he begins to see me as bad a person too? What if he gets to dislike me and then hates me after I've really started falling for him as you've said. What do I do then? Do I get to start all over again? And fight for myself on my own? Hei-Ran I really don't want to like Mr Lee, it would be too bad if I do" A tear rolled down her cheek. She was feeling emotional and she couldn't help it.

Hei-Ran felt sad for her. She moved closer to sit by her side and wrapped her hand around her shoulders to comfort her. This was the first time, Eun-sun was crying in front of her. In ten years and with all the hardships she had faced, never once did she shed a tear in front of her.

Now she was even more convinced that Eun-sun was really having feelings for her boss. She has not just realized it.

Gently Patting her on the back, Hei-Ran asked, "So what will you do now?" 

Eun-sun sniffled her tears, "I want to stay away from him"