I'm a Walking Disaster With My Unwanted Virginity

Chapter 284 – The Guilt Was Just Irrelevant

Though shocking, Marg had expected it. She could tell it the moment she'd first seen that gaze, the moment she saw…

Elsa was Helio's sister. And though they weren't blood-related, Helio really believed Elsa to be his sister. And Marg understood that well. 

That was why, things were shocking and complicated. 

"But you can do that as his sister and-" Marg paused. They were in a room of sorts. A small room with not much. She didn't want to say it but- but she had to. "And what if he rejects you?"

Elsa loved Helio. Not just sisterly love, no, rather it was the romantic kind. 

Elsa smiled. "Then I'll just accept that. I mean, I can't stay focused on him forever. I'll have to move on eventually." She looked up, stared at the ceiling, and then smiled at Marg. "But I want to do that on my terms. If he rejects me then so be it. I'll keep loving him, but I suppose it'll be just as a sister then like you said."

Even just months ago Elsa acted childishly so she could cling to her brother. But now she couldn't do that anymore. Sooner or later, she had to face reality. But before that, she was going to give her best shot. 

Marg didn't know what to do. Was there anything she could do in the first place?

'But would your relationship really stay the same?' She didn't dare say it. 

"I'm not asking your help," Elsa said. "I'm just asking you to stay out of the way till I acquire enough courage to say it. That's all."

Marg stayed quiet. 

But eventually, she spoke. She spoke about the possibilities if something went wrong. 

But both were aware that anything could have gone wrong as long as enough time was allotted.

'And what if he agrees.' What if Helio just accepts Elsa? What then? 

Would Marg and Helio's relationship be the same then?

They still talked about it for quite a while. 

In the end, Elsa walked out. 

"Think I'll just-" She paused and looked at the hallway. 

"What?" Marg also came out of the room and followed Elsa's gaze. 

Helio was walking this way. 

"Heli-" Marg was about to call out but- she didn't. Something was different. 

Helio didn't even give a second glance at them. 

'Did something happen to him?'

She wasn't quite sure but she couldn't really bring the courage to go after him either. 

She felt this weird sense of guilt. Because of her, Helio had to go another dimension, risk his life, and then for that his family suffered. 

She was really guilty about that. 

***

This was a temporary villa. 

But everyone still had their private rooms. And that included Marg too. 

Inside the room, she sat on the wooden bed. 

There were just three things on her mind. 

One, what to do in the future; two, how she'd make up to Helio; and three, Elsa. She didn't know the answer to any of them.

Marg had one dream since childhood: kill her father and secure a future with her mother. 

But due to Helio's intervention, that dream wasn't necessary anymore. After all, her mother was safe and so was she. She didn't have to get married into the Battlesuin family either- though Helio being a Battlesuin was kind of ironic in that regard. 

But now that, that was done, what now? She never thought past what she'd do in case she succeeded. She'd taken it for granted that she'd die: So, she didn't need dreams or goals. But now that she hadn't, now that she wasn't alone, now what?

No matter how she thought about it, she couldn't really think of anything. What could she do? Did she ever have any dreams for the future? Did she want to be something?

She could teleport and that power in itself was very rare, probably the rarest. But just because she had a rare power didn't mean she could get any job she wanted. Were there jobs that she even wanted?

Thanks to her calculated saving schemes, she did have enough money to last three- or maybe four years if she were to be alone. But she wasn't alone. She had Helio and a growing life in her belly. 

She couldn't just think of a certain goal and be done with it anymore. She had to carefully consider everything so her future, no, their future was the best it could possibly be. 

She still had high school to finish but, did she want to go to college? Was there any point in going to college? After all, without a proper career in mind, going to college just felt like a waste of time to her. 

'But if I have a kid now, would I ever be able to continue my studies or ever get a job?'

She knew it was possible. She had prior experience in raising her little brothers and sisters. And since Helio's family was here, she wouldn't have that much of a trouble. But she knew, it wouldn't be easy. 

'Isn't there something I could do without actually leaving the house?'

With a bit of courage, she started a call.

"How're you today?"

It was her mother. 

Her mother was really worried. 

When Helio had left, Marg had received a call from her mother and her mother explained everything to her. But due to circumstances, they never got to talk enough. 

"I'm fine. What about you?"

"I'm great!" Her mother was really happy to hear from her daughter. These last three days, she barely slept and she almost developed a heart condition. Working as a maid was hard enough and with the added stress, things weren't that great.

So, when her daughter came out unharmed, she was beyond overjoyed. 

Marg tried to think of things. "What am I good at? Or to be more specific, what can I monetize without leaving home?"

"You're good at doing chores inside the house, but I guess you're not asking about that."

Marg scratched her head. "Don't I have any talent? Singing, dancing, and all that?" A second later she realized, if she had any talent, wouldn't she be the one who'd know first? And not her mother? She sighed. "Never mind. I'll go."

"A talent, huh? You never really were the athletic type. Your dancing was clunky and you're tone-deaf, so I wouldn't suggest either." Her mother thought quite hard. "How about some creative things? Have you ever tried writing a novel or maybe drawing something? You can also try acting- oh right, expressing yourself might be tough." 

"I'm not interested in writing novels. Drawing- or rather painting…" It brought back some memories. 

Before turning ten, she drew a lot of things with mud on the walls of their barn. They weren't art pieces but she was proud of them.

After getting caught and lashed for it though, she erased even the memory of drawing. But now that her mother mentioned it, everything came back like it was yesterday. 

"Think I'll give it a shot." And she wanted to experience that nostalgic feeling again. 

"I don't mean to intrude too much, but what for, dear? Do you need money? I could always-" Her mother had saved up a fair sum. 

"I want to have a dream. A dream of achieving something. It doesn't have to be big, but it just has to be there. And no, I want to try earning money myself. I'm cutting the call." Marg knew if this went on, her mother would send the money regardless.

Her mother giggled. "That's so like you. Take care."

"You too."

The call ended and Marg headed out. 'Like me, huh?' She didn't really know, what that meant. 

On her way, she ended up meeting Elsa and both were headed for the living. 

They heard the voices of Helio and the others. 

But by the time both of them reached the living though, Helio had already left. 

Sigh. 

***

Later, Helio had come back with a massive snakehead. Just the sheer size was enough to give Marg a scare. Just moments ago, she saw superfast housebuilding and now a massive snake!

But she was more worried about Helio.

And yet, she couldn't really say much.

Lunch was also rather quiet. The food was good, but strangely, she didn't know how to approach him.

After lunch, she saw Helio walking around absentmindedly and heading to the roof. 

She followed him and after a bit of self-lecturing, she acquired her courage to go to Helio and thank him. 

And yet, in the end, she realized, that thanks wasn't actually necessary. Helio just loved her enough to go after her without caring about his own life. And she loved him. But she wanted to love him more. 

She wanted their future to be better. 

"I want to try drawing."

"Drawing?"

"Yeah. I haven't drawn in years but-" She paused. "I think-"

She had talent in drawing- at least according to her. So, if she worked hard and stayed diligent, maybe she could get better and even end up earning some pocket change for her family. After all, she'd basically be sitting around the house for a few months. So, something was better than nothing. 

"Sure! I'll root for you."

Marg chuckled. "You didn't even let me finish!"

"I don't need to. I mean, I'm fine with stuff that makes you happy." Helio came close to her and gave her a smooch. "Though I'd appreciate it if you didn't take too long drawing and ended up shortening our 'us' time."

Marg giggled but didn't quite say anything. 

They both chuckled. 

Maybe she was just overthinking things. After all, around Helio, she never had trouble expressing herself. And Helio was Helio. Even if he took in his sister, the fact that Helio loved Marg so much, was enough to convince her to not try to get in their way. 

At the end of the day, Helio was still hers. 

So, all that guilt, all that worry, were just irrelevant.