Why Did I Become the Villainess?

  "Ysa, I love this novel of yours. I just don't understand why they rejected it before." Lena grumbled while reading the first half of the King, Are you gay? novel.

 I've been working on it for a few days now. And since Lena is currently on leave, she volunteered to proofread it for me.

 "It's not the same novel I've submitted. I've revised it. Although I still prefer the old version of it." Sighing, I continue mopping the floor of our apartment. 

  Lena and I are both living in one apartment. She's on leave. That's why she got a lot of time on hand. And of course, since I haven't published a book, I don't need to go to our office. I just go there if I will submit my manuscript or any concerns they want to talk about my novels.

 "Really?" She puts the notebook down and looks at me. "So, what was the first version then. I want to know. You said you like it more, right?"

  I nodded and put aside the mop for a moment. I sat beside Lena and told her how the story was like in the first version.

 "The only difference is, the first version is quite light-hearted and isn't that complicated. Csille, the villainess, was not really a bad character in it. She's nice and was loved by everyone as a child. She and the Crown Prince Fraser were childhood sweethearts. They were really close. But she changes when she noticed how Prince Fraser is starting to get interested in his royal guard Farren, the crown princess in disguised. Csille then starts being too clingy and wanting Prince Fraser's attention which in result made the Prince irritated. Csille thought that the Prince couldn't be homosexual, so she focuses her attention on Farren or the cross-dressing Princess Paislee." 

 Lena waves her hand at me, signaling me to stop. "So, you're telling me that Prince Fraser and Csille was really a thing before. But it changes when Princess Paislee comes in between them? So, all along, Princess Paislee is the third party?" 

 I shake my head. "Prince Fraser liked Csille, yes, but it's not enough for him to marry Csille. So, Princess Paislee didn't get in between them. It's just that Csille thinks that way because she grew up with Prince Fraser. And since they were a child, the King and the Queen already decided their engagement. So, she thought she has every right for Prince Fraser."

 "I see, but in some sense. Csille is somewhat right, though. She's the fiancée of Prince Fraser, so at least she has the right."

 I shook my head again. "No, it's not an official engagement. So, it's still wrong to say that she has the right to Prince Fraser. Prince Fraser also didn't show any hints that he feels something to her."

 "So, the wrong one is Csille then?" 

 I sighed and took the notebook from Lena. I flipped the pages and took a piece of paper from it. It's a drawing of Prince Fraser and Csille when they were still young.

 "You could say so, but it's not entirely her fault. Look at this. They look so good together, right? And they're happy. It's just that Csille assumes something that is impossible to happen. And that's where it changes. From being an angel, she becomes a demoness. She becomes mean and cruel. She did a lot of things to ruin the relationship of Prince Fraser and Princess Paislee."

  "I kind of feel sad for her. She's the one who's always there for the Prince, but he still chooses Princess Paislee. But isn't forcing oneself to a person would make the gap bigger for them?"

  I nod at Lena's word. "You're right, and it was too late for Csille when she realized it. Prince Fraser was already head over heels for Princess Paislee. And of course, since she already doesn't have any choice, she decided to let Prince Fraser go. That's the difference of Csille on the first version."

 "Csille isn't really born cruel. She just changed herself because she got hurt and became selfish. She got too greedy on wanting something that's isn't for her, and it ruined her. She then decided to hurt and ruin Prince Fraser and Princess Paislee's relationship. In hope to be reconciled with the Prince, but it didn't happen. I now understand why you like the Csille on the first version." Lena took the drawing in my hand and looked at it. "I also like that Csille."

 "Too bad, I cannot make her like that. I need Csille to be cruel and mean. Selfish and very manipulating. I really don't like how the Csille in the second version doesn't have character depth and growth. It's kinda like she was just born mean in the beginning of the story until the end."

 Lena looks at the drawing again. "But I think this version would do too. Since most people nowadays like these types of stories. But I have a question, though." Lena looks at the notebook. "Why did you write on this notebook rather than type it in your laptop. It's the first time I saw you write instead of typing."

 I look at the notebook that the little girl gave me. It's the same notebook where I write the King, Are you gay? novel. I then remember the little girl's words.

  "Since you help me, I'm giving this to you. You want to be a writer, right? Write your next novel on this notebook, and you'll be famous for sure, but you should be-"

  Well, there's nothing wrong with doing it. There's nothing I could lose. Well, apart from that, it could be my last shot of being a writer.

 "I just wanted to try it. Who knows, maybe I just need some change, right? Anyways, what do you think about the novel? Is it okay? Do you think people will like it?" I eagerly asked Lena. 

 "I think it has potential. I'm actually already hooked on the first chapters. It's just that I find Csille really annoying. I hate how hypocritical she is. But other than that, I think people will like it." 

 I felt delighted when I heard it from Lena. Is it really true? Maybe it's the breakthrough I've been waiting for. "Really? You're not kidding, right? You're not saying it just for me to feel good, right?"

 Lena rolls her eyes at me. "You're my friend Ysa, but I wouldn't dare lie to you when it comes to your novels. Remember the last novel you've made me proofread?"

 I remember then how Lena criticizes the last novel I let her proofread. She was furious at my writing style back then. It was my first novel. That's why it has a lot of flaws. 

 I smiled awkwardly at Lena. "Of course, how could I forget that? You've advised me nonstop for a month to quit writing because of it. Afterward, you rejected me when I tried to let you proofread my next novel. But I couldn't blame you. When I read it, too, I felt cringy. It's a good thing, I'm improving now. But I do wish this will not be my last novel to write." I look at the notebook. 

 Lena then hugged me. "Of course it's not! Even though I often said to you to quit writing, I still want you to be a writer. So, don't lose hope, okay? Your name will be big in the writing industry for sure. And if that happens, don't forget you have a very beautiful best friend policewoman at your service, okay?" 

 I hug her too and laugh. "How can I forget about you? Of course, I wouldn't. And speaking of being big, didn't we have a plan to go to Big Bowl restaurant today?"

 Lena immediately stands up and drags me towards the door. "How could we forget about that one? Come on. I got hungry reading your novel."

  I just laughed and let her dragged me. It's a weekly habit of ours. We usually eat once a week at a restaurant called Big Bowl. It's one of the famous local restaurants here. And since we know the owners of it, we always dined on there once a week.

  After dinner, we went straight home. I started finishing the first half of my novel then. I was almost half of it. The story plot revolves around how Csille already knew the secret identity of Princess Paislee and how she tries to ruin Prince Fraser and Princess Paislee's relationship. 

 "It has a long way to go. But how will I make Csille's character eviler, though? Should I make her threaten Paislee to leave Fraser behind? But if I do that, how will I continue it? Or should I let her tell Fraser the lies of Paislee? But it won't work too." I slumped my head on my table. 

  "Why does it so difficult for me to make Csille a perfect villain?" I look at my old manuscript. "Maybe because I still hope that the old Csille will be back. But she won't be back!" I messed my hair out of frustration. 

  "Since I have no choice now, I'll just make you a real villainess then. Sorry, Csille."